Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Tarot- Ten of Cups

We all want a happy family right? I think, that is my greatest dream, to finally have a happy family. When I was younger I am fortunate enough to experience this, or maybe my mom was just to good in keeping the real status of our life back then. Well, to give credits to my parents, yes I would say that I still had a lot of happy family moments, but those days are long gone. I don't even know how it happened but everything is different now, and we are far from having a HAPPY FAMILY.

I went to a tarot reading session this afternoon. This is what I got for future when my cards are being read when I asked the question "Will "daddy" follow in Brunei eventually? The ten of cups
The future position indicates that your emotional contentment is coming. The Ten of Cups is a card that is the natural climax of the entire Tarot suit of Cups and so it functions well in the future position as a reminder that your goals in life are worth pursuing no matter what the current struggle may be delivering. Source

The illustration it self shows a "Happy Family". What a joy to see this. This is exactly what I had to see. A dream come true.  I know I may not get those branded clothes, or designer bags, or all those expensive things, but none of those matter. What matter most to me is that I have a happy and contented family. We went through a lot, its 10 years of struggle, and even up to now, our love story is still struggling. But, I will not give up, especially if this is the future that awaits us. This made me more hopeful, and I know, in time I will have that long time dream. To have a happy family.

Ten of Cups (Satiety): Fulfillment and joy in life and love. Feeling peace, tranquility, and contentment in friends and family. Taking delight in one's good fortune.

Tarot Reading

I went to POEA today, supposedly to process my OEC, but I was only given an appointment date and was asked to just come back. So I went to Robinsons Galleria instead and opted to consult a Tarot Reader.

I would say I was impressed on what came out of that consultation: (Here are the questions and the answers)
1.  Will I be fine in Brunei - according to the cards I will be fine, in fact I will be successful in my career. I will have peace of mind and I just have to relax and just let everything go to its proper place. I should not worry too much and start anew.

2.  Will my love ones be fine here - Yes, they will be alright, I should not worry and them they will be fine.

3.  Will he follow me in Brunei - she said he is still not sure as of this moment. He still has a lot of things in his mind. He is still not sure, and will have to settle all those things first.

4.  Will he eventually follow and reunite our family - Yes! he just have to settle some things and reflect on his own. He needs to prove something first, to my family, me and himself. Its cool the last card actually was a card of the happy family. Such a coincidence right?

5. I asked if he and little J will get along - this is very frustrating for me. I mean little J wont even get a long with her real father? ( I will write a different post about this)  Yes they will, eventually little J will be the one to make her relationship with her father better. Sooner or later, she will realize that her father is a good person and he loves her so much.

6. I asked about the other guy - there is another suitor, who still patiently waits for "daddy" and me to split, this I was really shocked at how specific the cards showed what is happening. 2 cards was about money, 1 card is about discontentment.  According to the reader he will try to woe me with money, although he is a good guy and I may be perfectly ok with him as well, but there is just something that is lacking. Something that will he can never give me.

This experience gave me a little bit more peace of mind. The past few days made me anxious of what will happen. I am too scared of what will happen. I would say that the answers are just what I needed and I would say truthful. Of course, its not 100% sure, but if peace of mind is what it gave me because of this experience then that is helpful enough to ease my mind.
What about you guys? would you consider consulting a Tarot Reader?

Sunday, March 27, 2011


I have so much to say.. a lot has been happening with my life. I am so overwhelmed, both good and bad. I'd like to think about the positive things though it also hurts that smiles also come with sadness.  A lot of momentous events happened in the past 2 months. I don't even know how to feel about it. Its like everything is on a "wait and see" phase. One special event was last friday March 26, it was little J's graduation. Im glad to be present on this event, I thought I will not be here to witness it. Then March 27, was Mama's birthday and I also have a lot of things to tell about that, not about the birthday but about little J's father.

I am leaving, soon, so soon that I really don't want to. I feel like I am going to blow. I have too much emotions, I am excited, anxious, sad, scared, all at the same time.

I don't want to leave.

I don't want to leave little J, nor her dad. It is sad to reunite after 6 long years and then we still have to part again. Its as if we are always separated for reasons that we cannot even understand why or how. One thing that I promised myself, this time I will not let go. No matter what. It is so hard to leave. I don't want to leave, but I have to. I am doing this for little J, for me, for "daddy" and for our family.  Hopefully we will all be reunited after a few months.

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Brunei, here I come!

I haven't been blogging for a very long time. A lot of things has happened, although a bit problematic I am looking forward to a another life changing event. I am leaving, for work abroad. Hopefully I can leave in a few weeks, there are just a few documents that I need to finish processing. My heart is telling me to stay, but I know I have to go. There are a lot of things to consider. First, I didn't know that I will spend this much with the documents and all. The medical robs me off so much, it's just too damn expensive. After the medical I am off to get my working visa from the Brunei Embassy (which I will do this afternoon) this is the easiest part if you ask me. Then off to POEA for the other OFW stuff that I have to process or else they will not let me leave. So with all those confusing, expensive and very tiring stuff to do I still have other things to deal with.

The first thing that I am very worried about is Moolah, I have to get some moolah. I wasn't prepared with all the expenses at all, when I was hired I thought they will take care of all the expenses, now I understood that I will shoulder everything even the airfare, Wahhhhh!!!! So there, I was surprised with how much I need to spend. Then, there are also personal stuff that I worry about, my parents and I are having problems as well. Then little J, and little J's father.

I don't worry about little J, she is coming with me to Brunei so at least I will not be worried about missing her, or how is she doing while I am gone. That is the main reason why I took this job offer, is that I can bring her along. The story about her father and I deserves another post, maybe even 7 or 8, haha. There are a lot of things that happened, which I am very thankful for. To make it short is that, we reunited after 6 long years of being apart. Some say its fate, some say its a miracle, some say its divine intervention... haha. Well, I am just glad to have him back and "happy" is such an understatement to express what I feel. I'll try to post more soon.