The day she met her Father

Today is a milestone in little J's life. Today she met her father, the last time they saw each other was 3 years ago. Little J can't remember him anymore. We went to Muntinlupa to accopany my aunt and I dont have plans to see him at all, before we get to my aunt's place little J requested if we can go to McDonald's to buy her lunch, I insisted that we should go straight to the house. My mom insisted that we should go to McDonald's until little J cried. So I just dropped the oldies at the house and the 2 of us little J and me went to SM and bought her food. I figured we already escaped from Mama we might as well pass by "daddy's house".

I asked little J if she wants to see lolo and she said yes, so texted lolo and asked if we can drop by. Unfortunately he wasn't at home but he said I could try to see "daddy" instead if he is already home. So we did, he wasn't home. So we left and went to my Aunt's place and ate our lunch. After lunch everybody fell asleep, including me except little J. When I woke up, I saw her in a corner doing nothing, looking really bored. So asked her if she wants to go to "daddy" again, her eyes lit up and she answered an astounding "yes".

We went to SM first, I figured I should buy something first for us to show Mama as an alibi that we went to SM. We went to National Bookstore and bought some paper and pen then we left and went back to "daddy's" house. This time he is already home. So we nervously went inside, his sister lead as to his house (he has a separate house inside their compound) and we sat there in the living area. He was so surprised to see me, I know he didn't expected that it was me and little J. He was already resting, when we got there. He hurriedly changed and went to see us. I was glad to see his reaction, I know he was happy to see us, or at least little J. He was shocked to see how big she has grown.


Nataranta sya talaga, he didn't know what to do, he kept on coming back and forth the bedroom and the sala. I introduced them to each other, the smile on his face is priceless.. I know he is so happy to see her. She offered pizza and tried to order, the funny part is that he cannot contain his emotions that he asked me to order for us. Taranta talaga, pinasa ko ulit sa kanya yung phone. Sabi ko, nakakatuwa ka. Wag ka na mag abala, alis din kme agad. Then the phone went dead, low batt. He dialed the phone again using his cellphone, then passed tha phone again to me. I said he should be the one to order, I don't even know their address and phone number so he got it and went to the bedroom and ordered. He said it will take 45minutes. I told him to cancel the order since we have to leave shortly.


He then, offered for us to go to SM, is just a few streets away from their place. I said ok, but little J is really uneasy, she is so shy. She doesn't know how to act with him. She wont go to SM she said she wants to go back to my Aunt's place instead. So I didn't want to push her, I said ok. So I told him that we should go. Little J is not ready yet, maybe if he could spend more time with her then she will warm up a little. Maybe some other time.


Honestly, I wanted to stay longer, or at least take his offer for snack in SM, but I am also scared that my mom will find out. She already called twice when we were at his place. I am still scared, I don't want to complicate things. I am really happy that little J and her father got to see each other, timely before her birthday and father's day. I sure hope that she can spend sometime with him soon.

It wasn't I expected it to be, I have imagined this maybe a million times before it actually happened and I really thought I'll be crying with so much joy to see them together but I wasn't. I was even eager to leave early. That wasn't the case 3 years ago. 3 years ago it looked as if I was trying too hard. Now, I really want them to get to know each other, to spend more time together, but I will not push it.


On my part, I am also surprised on what I felt when I saw him. It was really mixed emotions, I wanted to hug him, I really missed him so much, and seeing him overwhelms me. Just a friendly hug, now I know what JP felt when he came to visit me, some more years ago. I wanted to chat more with him, to really befriend him, but at the same time I don't him to think that I am still in love with him because I am not. I am nervous, ashamed, shy at the same time. He still looks so good, while I am at least 50lbs heavier. I am also mad and I wanted to tell him how awful I felt not having him around in this difficult time. I really need some help into parenting. I wanted ti discuss a lot of things with him, I wanted to ask him if he could see little J more often. I was a little bitchy, but some issues came to me at some point that made me want to be bitchy. There are some things that he said that was too awful to hear coming from him, if somebody else said it it would matter, but when it came from him it wasn't right. A part of me wanted to speak up, and I did, so I acted a little bitchy.


To sum it all, I am so happy that they met. I am so happy to see him. I am so happy to see them together. I wish there will be more chances for them to bond as father and daughter. Please pray with me for this.

Straight A's Again!!!!

Yesterday, I panicked because I didn't know that I was to pick up little J's report card last Saturday. Teacher Liza called me in the office and reminded me about it. She said little J has a lower grade this time because she always fail to do her homework. I felt so guilty, I know I am to blame, because I am always too tired to check if she does have an assignment. I don't sit with her and review for quizzes either. I am such a lousy mom in this sense. I think I focus more on how to provide for her, since Im a single mom. Earning enough is my top priority. That's why I have too much work to do. As an architect I am working on 2 Projects right now, A nail spa and a Bus/Heavy Equipment showroom, and this is still different from my work in the office. Then there is sweetytots-booksale, and internet shop/marketing is not enough for me I joined in a bazzar. Since my mom is in the US I also manage the house too, budget, bills, groceries. Then I still do paid blogging. So I am an Architect, an entrepreneur, a blogger, a housekeeper, a mom/a dad, all at the same time. I am guilty for taking the role of a "dad" too much, being the sole provider for my daughter, that I usually tends to forget on how to be a mom. I shower her with gifts, with toys but fail to spend quality time with her. We'll even though I have all this failures I am so happy and proud that she still got

Straight A's

as grade. She's smart and doesn't need much help on studying. You might be wondering why the teacher told me she got lower grades, she got A- in Writing it used to be A. But She got higher grades in 4 of her other subjects A is now an A+ for her Self Learning Activities, Reading, Math & Science. She maintained A+ for her Language and Values.

Here is the complete list:
Reading = A its now A+
Writing = A now A-
Math = A now A+
Science = A now A+
Language= A+ now A+
Values = A+ now A+
Computer= A now A
Self
Learning= A now A+

Narrative Report:
Independent. Jea is an independedt girl. She can do things with little supervision and now participates on every activity inside the classroom.

No more toys policy...

During the holiday season, I was able to organize and clean up at home and I realized that little J has too much, and I mean too many toys. So when I purchased little J's Kitchen set, I also made a pact with her that we will not but any toy for her after that since this is a big splurge already and she said ok. So I went on buying her the kitchen set, but just barely a month after I already bought 3 dolls for her. I only intend to buy one Baby ALive Doll, but I won ib both auction in Ebay. I didn't expect to win, since I bid really low. I won a Baby Alive sit and slurp doll for only $2.00 and another one for only $1.50. So its really a win, win. Maybe I just give that other doll as a giveaway. Then I saw another cute doll online and purchased it again without thinking, haha. It's for Php350 only. 14" Dora the Explorer Plush Doll. So since, I cannot give it to little J because of the "No toy policy" that I myself impossed, I'm planning to keep it all in a box so that she has a lot of gifts to recieve on her birthday. I told her that we will only buy toy for her on her birthday, and Christmas so that she will cherish each, and treat them special. That was how I was trained when I was little, that's way I really took care of my toys. Since I only get them twice a year.

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Im being too hard on her

Ok, I confess, I'm being to hard on my daughter. She is so smart and really advance both physically and intectually that I sometimes forget that she is only 3. She looks and thinks like 6yr old. Im so sorry, I realized it now, and I'm trying my best to clean up my act. I expect too much of her. There was even a time that I was expecting her not to wet the bed, only because I know she can do it. She is potty trained even before turning 2. She will tell me when she needs to pee, as long as she is awake. It was never hard for me to train her, she is just so smart. Infact she didn't even use a potty, she went straight to the toilet bowl, climbed it by herself. That's how she learned. There was a time, that she can also sleep all nighht, without wetting the bed. So I thought she can do that all the time. But I remembered she is just 3, and wetting the bed when asleep once in a while is normal. I should not expect too much of her. I am trying my best not to be angry everytime. She is such a sweet angel and she doesn't deserve how I treat her. I love her beyond the stars and is very sweet to her, but sometimes I slipped..sometimes I turn too a wicked mom, and shout at her. I know its bad, Im so sorry. Im really sorry. I love her so much, and it hurts me to remember times that I get to be angry at her.

Love you so much baby! I'm sorry, mommy will try her best to not do it again!

On a lighter note, I would like to share to you, Kids say the Darnest Things #5

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Benefits of Reading with your Kids

Once upon a time, parents read to their children before bedtime…before the regular intervention by television, computers and telephones. The children benefited from close contact with their families, they honed the ability to sit still and follow a story, their imaginations were boosted by all the creative input, and reading skills were put in place before schooling even started. And they all lived happily ever after.
Well OK, maybe the last bit is stretching it but the rest is not a fairy story. The benefits of reading to our children are immeasurable but in a world where screens rather than pages dominate, we need to try and re-introduce a passion for books and all they can offer. Here´s how:

Allowing children some scope to choose what they want to read is essential. Your child might not want to read from a classic but could happily sit for hours with comics or magazines…in this case a magazine subscription gives them fresh material every month.
We have to accept also that times have moved on, and whilst curling up on the sofa with a good book appeals to us as parents, maybe finding a website with reading material and games that encourage reading aloud may grab their attention.
Visiting the library is a fantastic way to let children browse through all the available books, letting them find one that triggers their imagination. Many libraries have reading groups for children, encourage them to try this once or twice…seeing other children get enthusiastic about books might encourage them. (Library books also encourage them to respect other peoples’ property as well, never a wasted lesson.)
One thing that never fails to get my kids attention is when mummy turns into Sinbad the Sailor or the Gruffalo…act out the story, make it come alive! Let them see what good fun it is, and turn reading into a game by asking what they think will happen on the next page.
Never discourage interruptions; it shows the story is prompting questions and triggering their imagination…just what you wanted!
Reading is a really special gift we can all give to our children everyday, if only for 10 minutes. It doesn´t cost a lot, is great fun and is a real investment in their future.


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Preschool Checklist Part2

Here is the continuation for the Preschool Checklist. The checklist is divided into categories, Social Skills, Motor and Self-Help, Speech and Language and Readiness. Im going to list down the Motor Skills and Self-Help Part 2. I believe this one is the most neglected part, maybe because things are so simple that we thought it will, just come naturally or some parents are so scared to make them try, just like letting them use scissors, but because of that too that we should take more effort into training them in this area. So this is one thing that parents should prioritize. My advice is to not be frustrated, since this are very simple things, we thought it should be a lot easier for them. Most kids develop this later than expected. My daughter has accomplished all of this skills, primarily because I recognized the need to train her and help her out with the skills early on. Most kids develop this skills at 4 or 5.



Motor and Self-Help Part 2
* Demonsrate coordinated large muscle movements- 1 foot hopping, skipping, jumping, ball skills, wheel toys etc.
* Comfortable on playroom equipment
* Spread with knife
* Manipulate item held with fingers
* Have established hand dominance
* Use a mature grasp on writing tools
* Draw simple figures
* Draw a 6-7 part person
* Copy a circle, triangle, square and cross
* Have simple cutting, coloring and pasting skills (yes mommies! let your 3 year old use scissors.. she first used scissors at 1year 7 months)
* Open and close lunh bags
* handle fasteners (butons, zippers) for clothes, learning to tie shoe
* Use bathroom porperly and obey rules of sanitation
* keep things out of mouth
* take care of own belongings
* copy and name a few letters (She just wrote me a Christmas Card) of course with the hep of her teacher.. because I will truly be amazed if she was the one who speeled it correctly.)

I am Guilty! I sneaked and I peeked!

When I drop little J to school today. I saw her class card on top of the teachers table. Ok, I know I should not touch it. It's their 2nd card issuance on Saturday and when I saw the report I was tempted to take a look. I wanted to see her grades. Ok, Im sorry I know, it was not right. But I gave it to temptation and got her card and took a peek. And I am so happy with what I saw.

These are here grades with the corresponding previous grades. I am so proud of my daughter she all straight A's.


First Quarter
Reading : A
Writing : B+
MAth: A
Science : B+
Language: A
Values : A
Computer
Education: A-
Self Learning
Activities: A-

Second Quarter
Reading : A
Writing : A
MAth: A+
Science : A
Language: A+
Values : A+
Computer
Education: A+
Self Learning
Activities: A+

Legend:

outstanding = 97-100 A+
Excellent = 93-96 A
Very Good = 89-92 A-
Good = 85-88 B+

She improved in all her subjects! Staright A's



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I found this in KidsAhoy.net, it so beaqtiful that I'd like to share it to all of you.

The Wonders of Learning

We all know just how fast time flies. And we all know kids grow up just as fast. To those who work, unable to spend as much time with their little ones, time seems to fly even faster. For me who does freelance stuff, it is no different. Although I spend a lot of time with my little girl, it still amazes me how fast they not only grow up but learn things as well.





Reb just started school last June but learning seems to be at leapfrog rate. Although she already knows much when she started school (thank goodness she was allowed to skip nursery), I'm still awestruck that this little tyke has evolved from that little baby to an honest-to-goodness kindergarten student.

Since her Ninang Diane gave her a Bible for starters last December, we read a chapter every night. We then start again once we finish the book. Now what I do is to let her end the sentences herself. She has also started reading so I let her read not the titles (she knows these by heart) but words within the story. Call me shallow but it makes me real proud to hear her read. It's a feat for me. What can I say?

Last week though, she has gone back to drawing. Now she draws herself and her classmates too, not just her, me, Wowo and Wowa. Once she was busy doing something in her study table. No complaints for me there. Anything to keep her still and quiet is more than welcome for me. When she finally rose from her little world there, she handed me a piece of paper which read:

REB LAVS MAMA

She wrote it all by herself, relying on sounds to write the word LAVS. I was probably too touched to cry. I just said, "Awww, thank you baby!" Smiling with pride, she then wrote something again.

LAV MIFOR KRI

I had to ask for her help on this one, particularly the last word. She said, "Love me for caring..." Apparently she forgot what she was suppose to write after that.

Days after she was unstoppable. I then try to correct her spelling in a pace which I hope is just right for her level. She wrote a thank you note: "TCQW TIA TIA TINI LOVES MI" which translates to "Thank you...Tita Trining loves me". Her spelling skill is still in its infant stage but I would say she has reached the texting level.

During those milestones, I realized just how happy it makes her to hear me say that I am proud of her. It is such a simple thing to say but come to think of it, it is something that uplifts the spirit of anyone, young or old.

I am also very careful though not to supersede her teachers by running away with my excitement to see her accomplish more. Inasmuch as I want people to respect my being her mother, I also must give that respect to her teachers for they know better how to teach her the basics. I would not want to preempt how and what they will teach her, lest I sow confusion in her.

More importantly, I try to be very conscious of the fact that although teaching is primarily the responsibility of our noble educators, parents have the responsibility to learn how to mentor their kids at home. It is like learning all over again for me, but this time it's because of my little girl. I want to make sure I complement the efforts of her teachers especially if they are doing a wonderful job. It did not escape my attention that for someone who just started school a month ago, I commend her teacher for helping her build that interest in learning. Before she started school, I did not force the issue of starting to learn how to read or write. When she showed interest in something, I follow through. Yet I could not deny the fact that I am not trained in basic education so I tried to be very careful in mentoring her while she hasn't started formal schooling. Right or wrong, I would like to think it worked for her and me. She seems to be doing well in school.

Being proud of your kids' accomplishments is one thing. Being part of their learning is another thing. The latter is much harder to do if you are not an educator by profession or if you are also working. I believe though that taking the time to find out how to complement studying in school and studying at home makes a whole lot of difference. It's not only bonding time with your kids that you accomplish. You also inculcate in them that learning doesn't have to be a burden they will carry alone. That you are in this together. I guess it makes learning a little less daunting for them if they know we are behind them all the way. Most of all, you also get to know your child and his/her abilities yourself and not just rely on what the teacher and the report cards say. Later in their school life, this knowledge just might come in very handy when you start feeling that they may be falling a little bit short of what you would have wanted them to be...or when you think they are not going the direction you would have wanted them to take.

Author:Nina Saldana is a writer/editor for almost two decades now. Although all her working experience is in business writing, what she really loves to write about is life and people, and everything else in between. She is doing freelance work (writing, editing, web design, among others) to hopefully have more time with her daughter.
Email: an.saldana@gmail.com Mobile: +(63-920) 4007045
Website: http://rebnin.multiply.com

How to stop the crying?

I know little J is sweet, pretty, but this past few days she's most of the time naughty. My parents see it as just "lambing" (sweetness) to me. She always whine and cry and make "papansin" (seeking for attention). She is extra demanding about everything. She will cry when I go to the office, she will cry if I'm late on my usual "I'm home" time. She will cry if I don't buy her candies, she will cry if I don't carry her. For G O D's sake, she is 20 kilos already, maybe a little more. Imagine that I have to carry her all through the mall, with my heals on. I'm already heavy myself, if I add our weight, we already weigh as much as 3 almost 4 sacks of rice.

I have to spend "5 minutes" on bed as soon as she wakes up. I have to be the one to hand her her milk bottle, even if yaya is handling it over and I'm 5 steps away. I have to be the one to accompany her when she needs to pee, and I have to stay by her side as she poo. I have to carry her all the way to the 4th floor, when I'm already dead tired carrying her in the mall.

Because of this I have my excuse of not loosing the weight, because I am a weight lifter in training, if I lose some pound I'll definitely wouldn't perform well with all the carrying. She is really getting on my nerves and I'd like to turn on the Monster mom mode, most of the time, which hurts me more that anything.

I just wish she stop all this "drama" and realize that she can make "lambing" (sweetness) by simple hugging, kissing, or even by not being the "monster kid" like what she has been acting.