I was never the "shopper" type. You can leave me in a mall for a whole day sale and I will still end up not buying anything for myself. Im not a compulsive shopper, unless its food. I always plan my purchase, budget before I actually buy, and most often than not if ever I buy something for myself I will end up worrying and neglecting I did. But of course its a different thing if its for my daughter.
Im still not a compulsive buyer, but I dont feel guilty if I do buy something for little J. Yes I buy her stuff every pay period, and i buy her pasalubong everyday. Even if its as simple and as little as choconut. I always get the same "hey yey!" when I come home. I even think that I splurge on little J's toys this season, buying stuff from come & play I already bought a vtech learning sytem from ebay, a building block set, a dress a bear set. Im also buyinh magnetic easel, and even some doll house. So I admit Im "kuripot" (thrifty) but that only applies to me. For my daughter I splurge. Im a selfless mom, some of my friends say, but this conversation with little J this afternoon made me realize that I should take care of myself more.
I fetch her from school, she's already wearing her civilian clothes. i asked her where are her uniform and read along to know the punchline.
Big J: Where is your uniform baby?
Little J: In my bag mommy.
Big J: Ok! Let's go.
Little J:(While looking at my blouse) Mommy? Is that your uniform too?
Big J:(Surprised) Uhhm, yes baby, its my uniform.
Actually, its not a uniform, but I have 2 shirts of different color, both long sleve stripes and I wear it at least once per week. She must have thought that its my uniform because Im wearing it too often. Made me realize that I have to buy myself some new clothes. Or else she will really think its a uniform.
Its funny because she's very observant even my clothes, but somehow its also sad, its a proof that I neglected myself ever since I had my daughter. Is it really like that? Do we have to lose ourself when we give everything to our children? Maybe I lovedher too much that I forgot to love myself.
No comments:
Post a Comment